Hi Elan's team, hope you guys are enjoying the well-deserved time off! 🥰
Whenever you guys would get a chance-- I want to ask questions on the application from the Response-Ability transmission; I am genuinely struggling...a bit.
I followed along with Elan's guidance. Not applying to my own beliefs yet, but soaking in. I am feeling the heaviness.. the dread and sadness... yes it doesn't feel good. Shifting to the new idea that aligns with love.. yes, it really does feel better. I can feel the shift. And it was done all in my head, within 10 minutes. I laughed when she said it felt too easy.
When I am applying the guidance to my own current beliefs however, I am feeling - I don't want to call it a resistance, more like.. a cry for help. I'll get vulnerable here for better context & hoping it will help others.
There was someone I loved and was in a committed relationship for 6 years. We had built a life then, and basically grew up together in our 20s. We moved across the country together. It was not a perfect relationship by any means, few red flags, but I willfully ignored since he had became a significant part of my life & influence on my growth. Though in the end, he ended up marrying someone whom he met for less than a year. I was cut off contact very abruptly. That was a year ago. I've been in a very loving relationship with another person since then, and we are progressing in our relationship very smoothly. :) I still think about the 6 year relationship to this day. No, not about getting back together with the ex (don't want that), but the memories we shared and the impact it had on me. As flawed as the relationship was, I like to believe that the love that was exchanged was... real. The love I had & felt for him was real. It feels like he had died suddenly, and I am grieving the loss of him & parts of me. So in doing Elan's exercise, the belief I was shifting (from negative) to was "He and you--we-- both agreed to participate in this relationship in that manner and the ending of it. It took an immense amount of love from both sides to create the experience together, for the important lessons we chose to explore in our own journey. Know that it was done with love. Know that it was for our highest good."
I truly believe this. I take a deep breath, and I read it again. I resonate. Elan.... it still really, really hurts.
I feel the love from the belief. I do. But it still hurts. Tears are pouring, emotions are still coming in, even after a year later, on and off. It's like time doesn't matter (even in 3D!) when it comes to these things.
I feel like I am guilt tripping myself for "choosing" to dwell on this & essentially is my 'fault', for the lack of better word, for feeling this way. But even with love IT DOES FEEL PAINFUL! And I can't--I just, I don't know 'can't' or 'won't', shift instantly like the exercise on this. I felt pain. I'm human. Elan, help. 😢 I'm going to chomp on my favorite chocolate cookies meanwhile.
Edit (08/07):
Thank you guys so, so much- for your heartfelt comments. I’ve been crying and releasing the emotions for the past few days, and I’m going to give the full attention it needs each time (if or when) it comes up again. I’ve read all the comments, digested them, and I resonate with your messages. I'm sending the love back to you. Thank you for taking your time, deciding to reach out and share help. You guys are truly the best. Appreciate each of you greatly. 🥹❤️
Your question is so important because we are here in this space to begin to walk the talk in our lives. As we do this, questions often arise which give the perfect opportunity to provide clarification, and give new perspectives to push forward our personal and collective transformation to our most authentic selves. Your willingness to participate in the "process" that was in the "Application from the Response-Ability transmission" demonstrates the clear willingness to jump into this all with both feet. You already witnessed, first hand, the clear effectiveness of this simple technique to use your imagination in order to provide a new template to blueprint new actions which cause a preferred belief to be expressed, rather than an obsolete unpreferred belief. This was the perfect first step, and for many, this is the only step necessary.
The thing about beliefs is that they are really a package deal. A primary belief attracts other peripheral beliefs to it, like an atom with its electrons. If the primary and the subsidiary beliefs are in alignment, that technique works quickly. If there is still an incompatibility between these beliefs, we receive an indication, perhaps you could think of it as a "red flag" to focus your attention on things that are still required to be addressed, additionally.
Remember that emotions are your windows to your beliefs. They are also the messengers which get your attention by virtue of their uncomfortable presentation. We tend to have an initial resistance, even sometimes panic when a negative emotion surprises us. But as we learn that they are indeed windows, we will begin more and more, to embrace and even applaud these emotions when they arise because they carry on their wings some of our greatest remaining opportunities for growth and the evolution of our consciousness. In this light, before proceeding, let's first say to you ... congratulations for your boldness to address these uncomfortable emotions and your courage to explore further!
You've already done some of the legwork here by clearly identifying that you are feeling a "cry for help" and are "grieving the loss of him & parts of me." These are really useful observations from an honest self-evaluation. And you're willingness to boldly share these "vulnerable" aspects in a public way proves that you are sincerely wanting to transforming this, while giving others the opportunity to benefit from the very same solutions. We often define vulnerability as weakness, but the flip side of vulnerability, removing the fear of attack, is a deep openness and receptivity. So, let's use that vulnerability to make lemonade out of these apparent lemons.
The statement that you could "lose" parts of a person and parts of yourself is one of the telling beliefs that is presenting itself to you for your reevaluation. We are often brought up to believe that this is possible, possible to be incomplete without some outer work outer support and outer validation, but this runs contrary to the primary belief that "I am already always a complete being". If you run these two beliefs, feeling "complete" and "incomplete without external validation" through the Response-Ability Application Demonstration, you will certainly feel the stark difference, and you will feel some version of the intense emotion that you experienced when you do this with the "I am incomplete and need someone else to complete me" option. The emotions that results from stating that disempowered belief will certainly feel like "heaviness.. the dread and sadness," and these are plainly and understandably experienced as very painful.
It is also really important to remember that the first step of using negative emotions as a compass to identify to negative expressed beliefs, is to FULLY FEEL the emotions, until they completely play out. Perhaps you have allowed yourself to feel this deeply and fully already. But, perhaps when these feelings have come up, they reach a certain intensity, and then you push them back down before fully expressing them. We mostly do this to "protect" ourselves before we understand the true nature of emotions, as arising from, and pointing back to, beliefs. Only you can know this. The thing that indicates that you haven't allowed yourself to feel them fully is was your statement, "I feel like I am guilt tripping myself for "choosing" to dwell on this & essentially is my 'fault', for the lack of better word, for feeling this way."
We say this because guilt (which is the withholding of unconditional self-love) and the assigning of "fault" are usually states of mind that cause one to squelch further full expression of these types of intense negative emotions. And, these are also some of those "subsidiary beliefs" that will also provide supportive benefit to for you to own and transform. In this case, the primary belief would be "I am complete" and the subsidiary beliefs would be "Therefore, I unconditionally love myself," "I always cut myself slack if I get results which are not yet up to my desires."
So, where does this leave us? It's a lot to take in, so let's break it down and keep it simple. Now that you're focusing in specific remaining beliefs, go and play with the Application Demonstration again using only your own beliefs. Start with, "I am not complete and require outer validation to be complete," perhaps infusing it with your historic situation to really muster up the emotion, and REALLY feel how this feels FULLY until it plays out. If it s uncomfortable, double down and truly allow it to purge completely before proceeding. Then, see which actions you've been outputting that correspond with this obsolete belief.
Then, do the same with "I am already complete." Really get into it and muster up the full emotion before using your thoughts to create the blueprint for how those emotions and ultimately those actions completely differ. Then come back here and report your findings. Only do this, if it excites you. This will assure you are of the most conducive mindset to get the best result. Once you report back, there are other possible exchanges to be had ... if this does not provide you with your own breakthrough on its own.
Yup, you just got ... homework. But if you choose to continue with this, let's instead make it ... home fun.