I did not know how much I did not know, my father barely read a book so if we are who we are the product of our environment then how do we change that? It hurts not being aware of how much kept from me
I will be as reposonsible as possible if I was given a second chance in life?
You chose to come here on Earth, to play the Earth game. You also chose the family and the environment and the themes to explore. In order to do this, you needed to forget who you are (whole and perfect facet of the Divine/Source/All That is). The first seven years are the programming years where you absorbed all the beliefs of others and began to form your own personality based on all the beliefs you accepted. Remember that your personality is an artificial construct. The bright light that you are, in a sense created a 3 sided prism (beliefs/emotions/thought patterns which lead to actions). These are beliefs, not truths. So once you become aware of the belief, you acknowledge that it has served you and you then choose what you prefer to believe. That's it. You just now "own" the new belief to be as valid as the old belief. You don't invalidate the old one, but you simply choose from a place of power.
Take a simple belief of "I can't drink coffee after 5 because I won't sleep at night". That is not a truth, it is a belief that keeps perpetuating until you change it. So now, I can drink coffee whenever I want is my preferred choice and I change the belief. At first there may be an echo of the old belief (you may find you can't sleep, but that's just an echo). Stay true to your new belief, reaffirm it and then in a short time, the new belief will be just as valid as the old belief. You don't need a second chance in life. You are an eternal, beautiful, powerful being. KNOW this. And choose from that state of being. Love and blessings.